April 13, 2014

Identical Twins are Terrifying..

Yes, even while they're still in utero!  In the month BTT (before the twins) but after the PPT (positive pregnancy test)  I longed for the 12 week mark to just get here so I could breathe again. As far as I knew there was something magical about that week that meant you no longer had to freak out over every little pain, abnormal feeling or complete lack of symptoms. It was also when we could finally tell people our BIG news of course. But then at our 9 week ultrasound we found out that our twins were special! They are what's called Monochorionic-Diamniotic (Mo-Di) Twins. This means a few things:
  1. They are in separate amniotic sacs but they share a single placenta
  2. They are identical. Yes we're sure. No they cannot still be a boy AND a girl!
  3. They came from a single egg that split some time between day 2 and day 7 (if they split earlier they would be Di-Di with separate everything and if they split between days 8 and 14 they would be mono-mono sharing both sac and placenta. Any later than that and they would be conjoined).
  4. I will be induced and most likely have a c-section, or at the very least deliver in a level 1 hospital operating room, and it will be during my 35th week.
The first terrifying thing? The labor and delivery scenario is literally the opposite of what I planned BTT. We were waffling between a relaxing home water birth with two lovely midwives and a doula or a suite at the local birthing center where I would have an all-natural water birth by a midwife and a doula. And then at our first appointment with Dr. M, around 10 weeks, we were told that due to them being Mo-Di we could no longer see our midwives for care. I was so sad at first but I knew we would do what was best for the babies. Then he went on to explain all the risks with an identical twin pregnancy and once again I was feeling the anxiety of those weeks before our first ultrasound.  He talked about a scary thing called Twin-to-Twin-Transfusion Syndrome, he detailed my increased risk of placenta previa due to the anterior placenta and then he dropped the 35 week delivery at a major hospital bomb. I was totally thrown for a loop. I went from feeling fairly confident that I was out of the woods, that nothing bad was going to happen, to knowing I'd be holding my breath until the babies are in my arms. I know every single pregnancy has risks but I had no idea how much scarier it could be with two. Nonetheless here we are at 19.4 weeks, both babies have strong heartbeats and are weighing in at 10.8 and 11.3 oz. with no signs of TTTS or any other problems.  I will go more in to detail about my diet, exercise and more later as I do think these things have to do with the health of the babies and how well I feel!  I am trying to be less terrified and just enjoy the fact that I've had a wonderful pregnancy. Even at their worst my symptoms and ailments seem like child's play compared to what I've read about and witnessed first hand. I just keep reminding myself that in a few short months they will be here and that any worry or stress will not change a thing!

We are having lunch at the Cheesecake Factory with C's family tomorrow. It's the first time we've seen them since finding out I'm pregnant so we're very excited to see everyone.  It's crazy to think that I was pregnant last time we saw each other (at Christmas!) but no one knew yet and now I'm huge! 

xoxo,
M

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